Being a crap mom last week= hard drive crashing on your birthday
I wish I was kidding. It's just my karma, if I believed in all that karma crap. I woke early this morning to be a bloggin' fool (guilt free, mind you), and to polish up the rice-crispy treats I made last night, and only one of those pleasures came to pass. And even the rice-crispies left me feeling hollow and empty because I ate them sitting at my computer in my g's WILLING the piece of crap to FEEL MY LOVE and to perform some sort of self healing birthday miracle. Clearly, no luck. Joy of joys. I started calling computer people at 6:30. I'm so lame. No one is open at 6;30 except the geek squad, and they were 11 days out!!!! What the...if I truly had to wait that long, you'd find me hunched in a corner wearing nothing but dirty rags rocking back and forth mumbling ..."11 days...end of the world...11 days...take me now". No way.
Anyhoodle, here I sit hours later at my nice friend Kristin's house, while the brilliant yet not so people friendly computer man has my baby in his shop. (he did look like Paul Schafer though, that is if Paul Schafer wore wranglers and cowboy boots...weird.) I'll have her back tomorrow and will be able to blog freely again. Meanwhile, I need to go ice my lip. Yes, you heard me right. On a whim I had Kristin (A.K.A.= angel of pain) wax my lip for the very first time today. I suppose it was some sort of payment for using her computer. She gets some sort of sick pleasure from ripping that little pain strip off...with no friggin warning whatsoever. Not even a friendly "okay, here I go", or "brace yourself", or "go change into a pull-up you wussy". NOTHING. But, here I sit 20 minutes later with a silky smooth stach-less lip. Lovely. What's even crappier is the fact I had to wax it at all. Why should I start getting fur on my lip now? at 32? I'm not tom selleck, or even a male for crap sakes. Only men should get hair in unwanted places as they age. LAME.
Okay, I really must get off AOP's (angel of pain...krisitn for the slow folks out there). I'll catch up for reals tomorrow when Paul...errr...computer geek brings back my baby. I'm gonna go dig some toys or clothes out from under my kid's beds so I can yell at them. If being rotten to my offspring eguals broken house hold items, I'll deal. Mamma needs a new front loader washer.





10 comments:
Okay. Miss Mogley just got off my computer and I have to defend myself. I didn't warn her for two reasons...1) it is better to not have the anticipation of pain. If you know it is coming, (which she clearly should have known by the bar of warm wax and muslin strip I was rubbing across her lip - duh,) it hurts a little more. 2) I may slightly enjoy the look of horror/shock that spreads itself across my victims face. Alright. I will assume the title. Fine.
Until later,
Angel of Pain
P.S. Tara was giggling the whole time she was blogging. I may have even heard a SNORT of laughter. Totally true. She gets way too much enjoyment out of blogging.
I didn't know Kristin was so skilled with the hot wax. And the fact that she calls people her victims, remind me to keep a hairy lip.
Hope you have a Happy, blog free, hairless lipped birthday! Whoohoo!
I'm going to get a brow,lip, and chin wax today. It really sucks. I didn't used to be such a hairy little monkey.
Oh my, I love your posts--they are hilarious. Was it your birthday? Happy Birthday if it was!! Sorry your computer is having issues & about your hairy lip...
OK, so maybe I should be parenting or whatever, but instead I'm browsing through the blogs of people I don't know in real life. Don't judge.
So, I'm hoping you might remember me from the MC olden days? (If not-- well, this is awkward, isn't it?) At any rate, I just had to say that it seriously, seriously, warms my heart to know that somewhere out there, there's a girl leading my exact same life: three kids, avoiding any cooking, cruising Target, and checking out Go Fug Yourself. *sniff* It's a beautiful thing...
COOKIE!!!!!! Holy cow! I am SO happy you (somehow?) found my blog!! you are one of the main things I miss about MC!! You better hang around. Are you a fellow blogger, or just a random comment-er? YAY cookie!!
File me under random comment-er. I keep making false starts at blogging, only to realize that I've got nothing to say, plus the horrible flashbacks of my frightful teenage journals. But I'm sure I'll jump in one of these days.
Oh, here's how I found you-- it's not as creepy as you think. So on MC, I just clicked the link to someone's blog-- and lo and behold, there are all the links to everybody else's! So eventually I end up on your adorable sister's-- who kind of has a shrine to you-- bringing me to yours. OK, my bad-- that does sound creepy. :)
On a different note, tell me you did not just bust out a Little House reference-- because I love it and I wanted to be Mary too! Eerie!
Now, keep up your fab blogging, because I've missed you!
Umm, is there an award for longest, rambly-est comment?
cookie cookie cookie. I in no way find you creepy. You better believe I'm all about viewing random stranger's blogs so it's just an fun happenstance that you found mine :) I can't believe you already found FUG. love it. Next thing you know we'll be signing our names togethter in nail polish to send to the Atticus Finch fan club.
We always were soul-sistas :)
yeah, i have a love/hate thing going with waxing. love that i don't have to pluck. love that i don't have a moustache. don't love the being sizzled with hot wax part. or the ripping and tearing. i don't think i could ever have a bikini wax. i'd probably die on the spot.
Post a Comment